The Man You Don't Want to See

He’s a cheap trick puffing
On a cigarette
You can find him at the jukebox
Or at the pool table
Looking for an easy mark

He’s a cashiered soldier
He’s a second-rate Don Juan
He’s the man behind the cage
He’s the smile you see on cable TV
He has his nose up the ass
He’s a jack of all trades
He’s as old as mankind
In search of a battle zone
A boner without a bone
He’s a sex addict
Hiding under your bed
A towel man cleaning up semen
From a brothel bed

Reciting the 23rd Psalm
He’s the difference between
Night and Day
A Preacher who sells options
On how to pray

In a downtown pawnshop
He’s a weather-beaten cop
Dining on mashed potatoes
And pork chops

Intent on winning over you and me
He’s into Yoga and a master of Zen
He’s the food in a pigpen

Of anyone who can do him a favor
He comes in 28 different flavors
He’s the stain left behind
In the church pew
He’s a masturbating monkey
In the zoo

Dressed in designed jeans
And wearing dark shades

A cheap treasure find
He’s the man you never want to see
When you wake in the morning
And see yourself in the mirror



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